Tech Support for a
4-year-old “Antique”

I’ve mentioned my UPS (Uninterruptible Power Supply) wasn’t working properly? I finally decided to quit procrastinating and fix it. I have assumed all along it needs a new battery —— mostly because the software keeps telling me that —— but I couldn’t find a part number or any definite information. I did come across the phone number for tech support (in New Zealand) and decided to call.

I reached a nice lady with a lovely accent. Sort of a combination of Swedish and Australian sounding accent.

She instructs me to unplug everything and we go through all the things on her checklist. I can almost hear the pages turning. When we get through everything checks out just fine except the battery is dead so she tells me to simply leave everything disconnected and let the battery charge.

I ask her why the software keeps telling me to replace the battery. She says we can fix that so we plug everything back in and start the computer up and she tells me to go into the configuration settings in the software and change the date to remind me when the battery needs replaced —— and reboot. I do so and she asks if I hear the warning after rebooting. I say no and she says “Okay then.”

Okay then what?

“We have fixed that then”, she says.

Of course we hadn’t fixed anything, it just wasn’t going to tell me about it anymore.

She insists I don’t need a new battery, I just need to charge the one I have. I ask her why it would charge now if it hadn’t for the past month? I tell her it has held a charge for the past 4 years but now it doesn’t so I think the battery needs to be replaced —— which is why I called.

There’s a pause and she says she didn’t know I have had it for that long.

Earlier in the conversation she asked when I had bought it and I told her it was some time in 2005 —— duh?

Now she suddenly agrees I do need a new battery but has no idea what the part number is, how many batteries I actually need or where to get them. She gives me a case number and new phone number to call. Swell.

I call the new number, give them my case number and after some time spent listening to the new guy with the same accent (sounded better from the lady) we finally determine it is NOT my fault they no longer make the gadget and yes, I can order new ones (I need two batteries), the part number, etc.

I evidently bought the last one of these this company ever made and it is now ancient history having been four whole years ago. It is weird listening to someone tell me I should feel lucky to find parts for something obviously that old. Imagine. Imagine.